Reply With QuoteIn the car with Sam on the way to football today, wearing my Heuer Bund...
Sam: God, that watch is ugly.
Me: It's a military watch, Sam.
Sam: You're not military though, Dad. You're 52 years old and you work from an office at home.
Originally Posted by hogthrob
I love that kind of thing. I quite like it when something is misheard, too.
My son used to call dual carriageway 'George Carroway' so that's one we still use regularly.
I hope you told him straight up that there is no Santa Claus: You destroy my illusions, I destroy yours.
Brilliant! We need him in the bear pit :)
I heard that the trampoline was acctualy called jumpoline up until someones mom jumped on one back in the 70s.
Cleaning my teeth makes me want to wee.
According to the Budget calculator on the BBC website, I will be £251 better off over the next 12 months.
Yay!
Although no trees were harmed during the creation of this post, a large number of electrons were greatly inconvenienced.
£336 for me and mine. Believe that when I see it, and even if I do it and then some will be swallowed up by my extortionate London rent which is bound to leap like a salmon way above inflation.
Oddly I am 1200 worse off. Fanfuckingtastic.
"Bite my shiny metal ass."
- Bender Bending Rodríguez
Whizzing whilst brushing is quite a skill.
Easy in the shower
Easy in the shower
One of the many life skills taught by the army is how to shout VERY loudly and the gentleman who jumped in front of me in the taxi queue last night found this out. It had been a long day's travel and spending over 2 hours on the tarmac at Heathrow in a plane full of little Tarquins and Tamara's on the way to their Easter skiing holidays hadn't helped. Waiting 30 minutes for bags to arrive and finding a distinct dearth of taxis (together with the couple of Negronis I had in the lounge at Geneva) meant that the self-important twunt who thought that he'd just jump in ahead got "STOP! THAT IS NOT YOUR TAXI; GET BACK IN THE QUEUE" at full, All Arms Drill Wing, volume. With hindsight watching him jump two feet in the air as he was about to grasp the door handle was bloody funny and looked a little bit like the start of a breakdance routine - I was standing just behind him and my ears hadn't popped yet. The taxi driver was a bit nervous on the drive home but it all ended well.
In the Sotadic Zone, apparently.
Although we don't have any snow here in the Deep South, I'm still fed up with winter and want it to go away.
Although no trees were harmed during the creation of this post, a large number of electrons were greatly inconvenienced.
if i deliver just one swift kick to the client's goose eggs this afternoon, surely nobody would mind
I'd have loved to have been in that queue- i'd have laughed my nadgers of the twonk!!
John
You sure its your teeth your brushing?
“Don’t look back, you’re not heading that way.”
£1,274 worse off for me - gits!
z
Am I the only one who's seen the new iTrader tab for member feedback, because I can't find a thread about it?
Nice one Eddie - that's a genuine improvement on the H&V of old. (By the way, I think you can also add it to the "context menu" that pops up when you click on a member name in the sidebar.)
There's a thread:http://forum.tz-uk.com/showthread.ph...11-iTrader-Tab
I didn't get an Easter egg
I had 2 but feel like any chocolate after a near week of sickness
I was accompanying an officer to the Mess one lunchtime at Aldershot barracks and we were chatting away when, without warning, he shouted at two soldiers manning the gates for some transgression he'd spotted. They jumped to attention - but nowhere as high as I did, he bloody deafened me! (Never knew you chaps were taught it, btw).
R
Ignorance breeds Fear. Fear breeds Hatred. Hatred breeds Ignorance. Break the chain.
There seem to be significantly more gingers in Hamburg than I'd remembered.
In the Sotadic Zone, apparently.
I have just seen an email at work from "Brian Case".
I tweeted for the first time today. Not sure how I feel about that.
Dave E
Skating away on the thin ice of a new day
Or bite your cock to stop you weeing at inappropriate times....
Ashamed?
Although no trees were harmed during the creation of this post, a large number of electrons were greatly inconvenienced.
The old Marconi factory building with the 'sine wave' roof in Chelmsford has been demolished.
I know, I know - got lots to pay out this year (planned) and I really would like a nice Heuer Autavia - trying to be strong (ish)..........
When you look long into an abyss, the abyss looks long into you.........
What a shame. In my universe it would have been.The old Marconi factory building with the 'sine wave' roof in Chelmsford has been demolished.
My job is a joke and at 48 I feel bloody worthless :-(
Sad but what was the point in trying so hard all my working life and only end up here.
Right I'm off to find a length of rope.
I just saw a Toyota GT86 on the road. A fine looking car indeed.
I just passed Steve Harmison in the car, I do not like his car. Then again, it was probably for free.
I haven't had Mcdonalds in ages... tasty (ish)
Mmmmmm...... I fancy a Chinese tonight.
Although no trees were harmed during the creation of this post, a large number of electrons were greatly inconvenienced.
I got one but its still in the cupboard.
I had 2 but feel like any chocolate after a near week of sickness
Paul
GOT...TO...KILL...CAPTAIN STUPID!
Currently in Bangalore and am very very bored. Saturday's night alright for sleeping!
Golf tomorrow. 6 sleeps before I can go home.
Whoever does not know how to hit the nail on the head should be asked not to hit it at all.
Friedrich Nietzsche
[redacted]
-- Tim
Last edited by in_denial; 28th April 2013 at 00:21.
Indeed, but the golf was good today. You woud be amazed how far a golf ball will travel at 3000 ft and 32 degrees of heat. Plus you can get a caddie for 200 rupee or £3 in proper money. Had to have a caddie just to carry the two litres of water I drank - without having a pee - like a sponge !
Internet connectivity from the room is however. 600 rupees and it's not quick.
Only 5 sleeps to go.
Whoever does not know how to hit the nail on the head should be asked not to hit it at all.
Friedrich Nietzsche
I saw Thomas the Tank engine going down the road the other day
Seen 2 crows mating near the footpaths on the ground, just behind the fence...and I thought...dirty birds, get a nest or private branch. However I was quite pleased to see this rare occurance, as I've never seen it before
Next morning one of them was still there...dead
I thing they were not mating...
It's not anymore as of Monday night.
Paul
GOT...TO...KILL...CAPTAIN STUPID!
This itrader thing appears every time I press Profile.
Paul
GOT...TO...KILL...CAPTAIN STUPID!
There's a luxury department store in Mexico City called Liverpool. If only they knew....
In the Sotadic Zone, apparently.
Posting Permissions
